How I coped with my testicular cancer diagnosis

Towards the end of 2019, I had the weirdest sensation and felt a heaviness in my pelvic area and a dragging sensation in my tummy. I went to the doctors, but no one seemed to know what was happening or what to do. I was also having a lot of water infections so they thought it might be something to do with my prostate, or a testicular infection.

I thought they would examine my testicles and was frustrated when they didn’t. I felt something wasn’t right and felt like I was being ignored or made to feel there was nothing wrong. But I trusted what they said when they told me I had an infection. I assumed everything was okay as I was told people my age shouldn’t worry about cancer, as it’s not something you really get when you were young. I trusted what the medically professionals told me.

I was given some antibiotics and sent away. I was given four different types in total, but none of them did anything.

I was also feeling very tired. I could be awake for two hours and feel like I needed a full night’s sleep again. In January 2020, I examined myself and found a very hard lump in one of my testicles. I went to the GP and they examined me this time.

I was referred really quickly for an ultrasound. The sonographer called the GP and said that he couldn’t say for certain, but that he was 95 percent sure it was cancerous. He told the GP what blood test he needed to give me and an hour later I was having it. I was referred for scans and my mum was prepared for the news that it was cancer.

A few days later I was listed for surgery and I felt really anxious running up to it. It was like I was on a train station and everything was moving really quickly around me, but I wasn’t moving. I didn’t know how to place my feelings. I felt angry, upset and drained.

I had my surgery just after the country went into lockdown. I went in as a day case and it was the most unreal experience. I have severe asthma and Bronchiolitis obliterans, which causes inflammation in the airwaves, so I was used to going to hospital and seeing other people there. I used to find comfort in the fact that there were lots of patients there, but this time it was just me and two nurses assigned just to me.

I would’ve loved to have had my mum and dad there as I was sat in a room on my own festering on my thoughts.

I had to wait for the results of my CT scan for four days, and it felt like four months. I received the news from a nurse over the telephone and it wasn’t nice. I heard what she said, but it didn’t sink in. I went about day to day activities and blocked it out like it wasn’t happening. It wasn’t until my mum came home from work and asked if I had any news, that I told her I had testicular cancer.

My mum went into panic mode and called the hospital to find out what the next steps would be. That’s when it all hit me. I assumed cancer was something older people got, and I assumed it wasn’t something I needed to worry about at 23. After being diagnosed, I realised cancer does not care about age.

The consultant said that, going on the CT scan, they’d got enough of it out, so I was happy that I didn’t need any more surgery. I was told that normally they would give people chemotherapy to ensure that the cancer wouldn’t come back, but because of Covid they didn’t want to risk giving me chemotherapy due to my underlying health issues. Instead, they were putting me under surveillance where I have blood tests and scans every three months, along with testicular exams. I was happy that I wouldn’t have chemo but I was a little worried as chemo would have given me more security and ensured that there wasn’t any more cancer anywhere. I had mixed emotions.

As soon the nurse told me I had cancer, I was referred to Chris, Teenage Cancer Trust’s outreach nurse at the time. She called me later that evening. I was emotional and anxious, so it was good to have someone to talk to. I didn’t feel like I was talking to a clinician when I chatted to Chris. I was able to open up to her about what I was thinking and feeling.

She also explained that young people experience and react to trauma differently. She told me that I could get some psychological help with my diagnosis. I had a bit of a wait to get a session with a psychologist and I felt a bit isolated during that time as I couldn’t socialise with people, but when I got to speak to the psychologist it really helped and set my mind at ease. I was able to speak to someone who wasn’t as invested in my life. My mum was always there and wanted to talk but I felt guilty as I didn’t want to upset her more.

I was also introduced to Steve, Teenage Cancer Trust’s Youth Support Coordinator for the area. Steve added me to a Facebook group where he invited young people with cancer to online events during Covid. Man United player Max Taylor spoke to us about his diagnosis of testicular cancer and how he overcame it. I found that really helpful as it allowed me to feel more open about asking questions.

I also attended things like lads’ curry nights and made new friends. I feel like some people look at you like you’re the black sheep once you’ve had cancer, but my new friends didn’t look at me like that. When people have been through cancer, they don’t have to speak about it all of the time; they just understand. I have made friends for life.

Teenage Cancer Trust staff made me feel like a person, not a number in the system. I know they genuinely care.  Chris has retired now, but I don’t know what I would have done without her in the early days. Steve is still there if I ever need him.

This year, Cameron was one of our special VIP guests in our Ultimate Backstage Experience at the Royal Albert Hall. Every night of our Royal Albert Shows, a few special guests who had been treated by Teenage Cancer Trust were invited to a special backstage experience, which included an opportunity to go onstage in front of a capacity audience. Here are his thoughts on the day. 

I was nervous about being a part of an event after having cancer and isolating for so long due to the dangerous nature of Covid to people whose immune systems are suppressed. I’ve not been to a big city like London or to a gig for over two years and I’m not used to being around groups of people, so I was a bit anxious. But I wanted to do something outside of my comfort zone and start getting my life back to normal after feeling isolated for so long.

It was nice that the other young people at the event had a similar mindset too. We were all in the same boat. We talked about our experiences and it was nice to meet other people who had been through cancer. But we didn’t talk about cancer the whole time and we had a laugh too. There were none of the awkward questions that other people still ask, like: ‘How are you feeling? Do you still have cancer? Are you worried in case it comes back?’ I felt that they just got me. We could talk about the cancer if we wanted but we didn’t have to explain ourselves.

The Teenage Cancer Trust staff were really attentive too and kept asking how we were. This was really important to me as I normally suffer in my own thoughts and don’t ask for help if I need it. It was good that the Teenage Cancer Trust staff recognised that we may feel too nervous to voice concerns and they made it really easy for us.

I’d never been to the Royal Albert Hall before, and we were given a tour. It felt really intimate as it was just our group on the tour and we got taken around all of the levels. We saw the stage from different viewpoints and it’s not something I could’ve done if I’d just gone to a gig there.

We also got to go on the stage before Roger Daltrey CBE performed. I was nervous beforehand, and I nearly didn’t go on as I didn’t know what to expect. It was a surreal experience as we stood on stage looking out to a sea of people and the compere asked everyone to put their phone lights on. I felt a lot of support coming from the audience and I felt the energy of being on the stage. I’ll never get an opportunity to do something like that again, so I’m glad that I did it.

We watched the gig, which was Roger Daltrey and friends. It was a really good variety and I really enjoyed it. Afterwards, we met Dr Adrian Whiteson OBE and Myrna Whiteson MBE, who founded Teenage Cancer Trust.  They told us that they set Teenage Cancer Trust up so voices like ours could be heard. We got to meet Roger Daltrey and I could see how passionate he was about Teenage Cancer Trust. He said we were the reason he did it. We spent around half an hour talking to all of them and we could tell that they wanted to be there talking to us and listening to our stories.

Overall, I had an amazing experience. I made friends and I’ll keep in touch with the other young people.

After being diagnosed with cancer I have suffered from really bad anxiety. This experience has really helped me along with the stuff already put in place by Teenage Cancer Trust to start a process of recovery and getting me back to my new normal.